You are not alone (World Suicide Prevention Day)

I left the house, exhausted, emotionally empty, hopelessly helpless. My plan, as loosely-formed as it was, was to ride the Underground for as long as it took to build the courage to stop. To stop everything…

A text from a friend buzzed in my pocket, saying that they were in a local pub if I wanted to pop in – I thought it might be worth one for the road. I was terrible company, but went home after the pub instead of… well.

I have had other occasions where I was closer to the void than I’d ever wish to be again. Moments when hope was so far away, so hidden from sight, that I *knew* I’d never embrace it again.

A friend of mine saved my life by a text that night. Another by listening to me rant semi-coherently for hours on a phone on another dark night. I remain grateful in ways I can’t begin to articulate for the friend who spent every Tuesday evening with me for months. I was not alone.

On World Suicide Prevention Day 2021 I told something of my own struggles with suicidal ideation and what has helped me. There is a short video of that here.

I’ve been on the other side of that conversation too. I have lost one friend to suicide (that I know of), and walked with more than I would care to count who have trod the dark path towards that end. I could tell you stories where I have been on the end of a phone, trying to say something that will give my friend a moments’ hesitation, and worrying that either saying nothing or the wrong thing will tip them into the pit, never to return. You are not alone.

The stats on suicide remain stark, and the Global Pandemic, cost of living crisis and on-going environmental concerns all add countless anxieties about health, finance, job and relationship status to the mix in ways so many of us couldn’t have imagined a few years ago. You are not alone.

If you are struggling, or are a concerned about someone else – please talk. You are not alone.

There are many great organisations and individuals out there who can help, listen, show you where some light and hope might be found, hang in there for and with you. You may need medical help, or therapeutic intervention. You may need other resources, or just permission to admit you feel like you are carrying too much. You are not alone.

Suicidal thoughts are one aspect of our mental health and fitness – but we can and should be doing more to help people who are struggling in any way. One in six of us will experience a mental health issue of some kind each week in England [source: Mind], and being open about our own struggles will only help others feel able to do the same.

If you are responsible for others in a place of employment or education, consider training some of your staff in First Aid for Mental Health, running some training in resilience or well being, developing a Mental Fitness Plan for the organisation, or providing Coaching (I can deliver any of these for you, or help you find someone else).

You are not alone.

What to do if you feel suicidal

How to help someone who is feeling suicidal